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Esurientes - The Comfort Zone

Thursday, May 05, 2005

Chocolate Chilli Tim Tams

With BONUS illustrated instructions on how to perform a "Tim Tam Slam"!

A new Tim Tam flavour? Meh. I always think the original Tim Tams are the best. If it aint broke, don't fix it. Well, apart from the dark chocolate ones. You always get fewer biscuits in the special flavour packets anyway - 9 instead of 11. The chewy caramel ones aren't worth it, and the Tia Maria flavoured ones (yes, we have alcoholic flavoured biscuits) are a bit overhyped and overrated. So, hmmmmmm, what's this new way they're trying to reinvent the wheel?
*WAIT* Ohmygawd! Chilli?!?!?!?! Chilli DARK chocolate??!!! Chilli dark chocolate TIM TAMS??!!! Evidentally jumping on the whole chocolate chilli bandwagon here, but hey - that's a combination I like!


And yes, I was in 7/11 at the time, so I paid through the nose for this packet.
Tim Tams are the MOST famous Australian biscuit. More so than Anzacs. More so than Iced Vovos, more so than....erm....Tee Vee Shapes or Milk Arrowroots (bleah). These are the chocolate biscuits Aussie expats around the world will go into raptures about, if you give them half a chance. And yes, they are as good as the Aussies say they are. Two crispy wafers, sandwiched with a creamy chocolate filling and coated in thick chocolate.

Before you start emailing me in excitement, the odd looking circle on the top of the biscuit is where it was pressed against the plastic, not some eerie crop circle or Virgin Mary appearance, ok?!

The most famous way Aussies will use these biscuits is as a straw for hot liquids - aka The Tim Tam Slam. This is a very famous and very Australian way of having a Chocolate Orgasm - any passing Australian you happen to flag down off the street would easily and enthuasiastically demostrate this skill to you. We're very eager to convert.
What you do is you take your Tim Tam (any type, but not the chewy caramel ones - they don't work) and take a small bite from each opposing corner. See below:

Here's one I prepared earlier....

And you take your Tim Tam to your cup of hot liquid (say, a nice, hot cup of tea....*), dunk one bitten corner in, and take your lips to the top corner (where you've bitten off the edge):

Tim Tam poised for slamming above a nice, hot cup of tea.

Now, with your lips locked around one bitten corner, and the other bitten corner suspended in your hot liquid (and it MUST be hot, otherwise this doesn't work properly - sorry to all you cold Milo afficionados. It's just wrong, ok?!) you slowly start sucking. Be careful! Don't do it while your liquid is still at boiling point or you'll boil your lips off and drop your Tim Tam in your liquid, and that would be a shame. Suck slowly - about 3 sucks should do it. You'll notice the biscuit start to soften; this is your cue. IMMEDIATELY gather it up into your mouth before it starts to disintegrate. The hot liquid has been sucked up through the crispy biscuit and soft filling into your mouth, softening and melting the biscuit and chocolate on the way. It will explode in a chocolately, biscuity mess in your mouth.
You will then experience a chocolate orgasm in your mouth! This is fact.
It's really something you must try, or at least watch an Aussie friend do and laugh at their hunched posture with ecstatic smiles on their faces. This is why expat Aussies in the UK and American spend a week's salary on hunting down and buying imported packets of Tim Tams. It's that orgasm taste of home, you know! :-)

Anyway, so how do these dark chocolate chilli Tim Tams taste? Well, I opened the packet and lifted on to my nose. They smelled like dark chocolate - they smelled just like Tee Vee shapes actually. I bit into one. Meh - what's all the excitement about? It tastes just like a dark chocolate Tim Ta........oh! I can taste something.....it tastes all warm in my mouth...............hmmmmm actually, it's getting a bit too warm in my mouth.....................arrrghhhhh, that's HOT!!!!
Ok - it's not like biting down on a whole chilli in a curry or anything, but these do pack some warmth. I feared that the chili would be so muted to appeal to the wider population that it'd be hidden, but it's definitely there. I LOVED it! These are my Tim Tams of choice now - until they're taken out of circulation for whatever new gimmick comes along - white chocolate and avocado, perhaps?

(* yes, it's from Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)


  • Rats!!!! We don't have Tim Tams here. Would love to have a demo of that "Tim Tam eating protocol". Had a good laugh reading your post Niki.

    By Blogger Ana, at 5/05/2005 08:56:00 pm  

  • I am SO jealous, Niki! Fark chocolate chili sounds like fabulous addition to the Tim Tam lineup. I wasn't overly impressed with the caramels either, but these! Yum.

    By Blogger Nic, at 5/05/2005 11:55:00 pm  

  • I've heard my Australian friends talk about Tim Tams before, but the straw this is new on me. Very cute!

    (And I must say, I thought that little mark on the picture was clearly a sign that your biscuit was actually a chocolate covered iPod Shuffle)

    By Blogger Brian W, at 5/06/2005 02:27:00 am  

  • Is it the Tims Tam ads on bus shelters that are so racy that I find myself walking into power poles?

    By Blogger Anthony, at 5/06/2005 09:50:00 am  

  • Ana - Yes, countries lacking Tim Tams are sad countries indeed ;-)

    Nic - Next time you're down here you must try some of these new flavours - we even have Blackforest Cake tim tams now!

    Brian - Yes! An iPod shuffle Tim Tam! That would be such a good seller down here. Incidentally, there are a couple of gelati places down here in Melbourne that do a Tim Tam gelati - which is pretty special.

    Anthony - nah, I reckon you're thinking of the Heaven icecream ads. You know the ones with the half naked chick body surfing on a chocolate icecream boogie board? :-)

    By Blogger Niki, at 5/07/2005 06:02:00 pm  

  • I am going to cry. I can't believe I left Melbourne for shitty weather, and now they taint me with the chocolate chilli Tim Tams? There's only so much a girl can take!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 5/09/2005 02:49:00 pm  

  • um. as usual, my fingers got ahead of my brain (or something). That should have read "they taunt me..."

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 5/09/2005 02:50:00 pm  

  • Lyn - Lol! It sounds like Melbourne is calling back you louder than ever!

    By Blogger Niki, at 5/10/2005 02:56:00 pm  

  • Niki, I have to say it's scary how much I agree with everything you say in this post! I was suspicous of the new flavours, and that the chilli wouldn't be strong enough but it is just about perfect.

    I had a cocktail the otherday at the carlton yacht club called "death by tim tam" that was pretty damn divine. On the otherhand, I always find timtam gelati a bit of a let down - not chocolatey enough.

    By Blogger joe cupcake, at 5/10/2005 04:58:00 pm  

  • Esther - Yes, I was so suprised I could taste any chilli at all! I do hope this flavour sticks around for a while as I really enjoy it.
    The CARLTON yacht club?? There's a yacht club in Carlton? How have I never heard about this?! But it's nowhere near any water....
    I agree with you about the Tim Tam gelati - I found it too water based and not creamy or chocolatey enough. However, the same place in Lygon St also does a Ferrero Rocher gelati, which I think is better.

    By Blogger Niki, at 5/10/2005 10:52:00 pm  

  • I live in the US, but spent several months in Australia a few years ago... your post reminds me of of how much I miss Tim Tams!!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 5/13/2005 12:24:00 am  

  • Chilli Tim Tams are the only one worth eating. The rest are digusting. In fact If any other Tim Tams are out or open for consumption, I would rather go without. With teh Chilli ones, I can't leave them alone.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 4/03/2006 10:08:00 pm  

  • I've never ever seen anyone use a Tim Tam to drink with aka Tim Tam Slam, in fact, I think it sounds disgusting.

    And yes, I am Australian.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 12/27/2006 03:41:00 pm  

  • Anon - thanks for the kind comment. Maybe you don't get out much?

    By Blogger Niki, at 12/27/2006 03:58:00 pm  

  • I'm from Malaysia but was in Australia for university a few years ago. My Aussie dormies taught me the TimTam slam. We'd have TimTam slam competitions. AND finish a whole pack of TimTams in one sitting! I put on LOTS of weight! :D

    I went back to Australia 2 years ago and ABSOLUTELY fell in love with the CHILLI CHOC TimTams! It's simply absolutely AMAZING! But recently, my friends down under told me they've been discontinued.

    BUGGER! :(

    p/s: I agree that the TiaMaria and Caramel ones were over rated :P. Any way to BEG Arnotts to bring back the Chilli Choc?


    By Blogger Wandernut, at 6/06/2007 01:14:00 pm  

  • Hi Wandernut, Arnotts website has a product feedback section. If you want choc chilli fling back, you could do as I have done and demand them to bring our favourite flavour back.


    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 7/11/2007 05:42:00 pm  

  • Hi We've been doing this for years with Penguin Bars !!!!!!!! but is interesting that after me and my friends doing this for at least 15 years some one else has started doing it

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 8/06/2008 12:23:00 am  

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